vendredi 30 mars 2018

Dear Dad...

154 Clymer Street
Brooklyn, NY 11211
Dollar Jinsheng
December, 14th 2025
963 Whyte Street
Adelaïde, AUS
Zhang Jinsheng


I know that everything you've done for me was for my well being, but you need to understand I need my own space now. I am an adult. I think you noticed our relationship is getting worse everytime we see each other. I am tired of always being the one who makes the first step.
We moved to Australia because you wanted to give us a better standard of living and I think you're aware that English is the official language in this country, so stop blaming me for speaking English! Because the only reason why I speak this language is you: you're the one who sent me in an international school, you're the one who made us move to Australia, you're the one who sent me in an English school there.
But, let's be honest, we are only in this country so you can make even more money than you used to in China. The only thing you think and care about is your money, your guns and alcohol. You love goods more than you love your own son. Can you believe that? You even named me Dollar! You are blaming me for being more English than Chinese when you gave me an English name! Don't you think it's ironic ? You've always known I was closer to my stepmother because I was longing for the woman's love I've never had. And you kept keeping me away from her, from that. I don't even clearly remember my own mom! I have to lie to people about my parents because I am ashamed of you, ashamed of not remembering my own mother!
I don't know who I am anymore, I am lost in my feelings. Am I Chinese? Am I Australian? Maybe both, maybe none, I don't know. That's why I am leaving. I need to find myself. Bye.


PS: You may need Google Translate, but don't blame me if there is misunderstanding this time. Just saying.


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